


Sonadow Week 2019: PRIDE Edition

by idolatres



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Sonadow Week 2019
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-17
Packaged: 2020-05-13 03:14:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19242679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idolatres/pseuds/idolatres
Summary: My submissions for Sonadow week Pride Edition! These range from fluff to angst, but mostly just fluff!RED: DAY ONE: LIFEORANGE: DAY TWO: HEALINGYELLOW: DAY THREE: SUNLIGHTGREEN: DAY FOUR: NATURETURQUOISE: DAY FIVE: MAGIC/ARTINDIGO: DAY SIX: SERENITYVIOLET: DAY SEVEN: SPIRIT





	1. RED: LIFE

**Author's Note:**

> RED: DAY ONE: LIFE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shadow coming to terms with being alive, and all the confusing emotions that go with it, most importantly: his feelings for Sonic

  
    It took Shadow some getting used to, being 'alive' again. There were so many things he had forgotten that comes with being alive. Eating, drinking, exercise, bathing, talking to others. Forming connections with them. Shadow thought it wasn't worth it at first, but his heart, his stupid heart. The most annoying thing to take care of out of it all: dealing with attachments to other.  
  
  
  
    He never got lonely before, never. The occasional memory of Maria flickering in his mind, like a video on repeat, but nothing beyond that. Now anytime he went too long without speaking to certain people, he felt a pang in his heart. Uncomfortable and saddening. Becoming attached to people, caring about them, actually feeling the physical need to be around them, it was embarrassing. The ultimate life form shouldn't need 'friends'. That's what he kept telling himself anyway.  
  
  
  
    With no goals to focus on, with no world threatening danger to face, he's left with only his thoughts. He's always enjoyed solitude, but more than often he found himself at Rouge's club. Despite living there, he didn't have to hang around so much. Being alone in a crowd was more comforting to him than being completely alone, and Rouge always made sure to check in on him. Amy also became close friends with him fast, countering his realism with idealism. Of course it was a bit of a chore getting used to her harassment, she insisted on grilling him once she heard the news that him and Sonic were a 'thing'. She reminded him a bit of Maria in certain aspects, but then her hero worship of Sonic and love focused brain would shine through and break that illusion with a hammer, quite literally.  
  
  
  
    Still, she cared about him and his and Sonic's relationship after she realized he was serious about it, and didn't plan on messing around. She became his biggest fan, eagerly cheering him on, offering unsolicited advice constantly. She was like an annoying little sister he never realized he needed. He'd never admit it, but it made being alive easier. His heart always felt relaxed in her presence.  
  
  
  
    Which lead him to his current situation. Sitting at a cafe with Amy, her waiting for him to speak with wide eyes as she gobbles up some cake. He called her and asked to meet up, hoping for some advice, this time with his consent.  
  
  
  
    The workings of a heart and the needs it has is still a mystery to him. Machine cogs that don't line up, grinding against each other with unsettling echoes, but he knows he's not a machine. He's 'alive', and what an annoyance it is. The most mysterious feeling to him is the aching in his chest that's been plaguing him while Sonic's been off on one of his impromptu adventures. It's been almost a week, and while Shadow knows he values his freedom, it's doing something unknown to him.  
  
  
  
    "I haven't heard from him." Shadow mutters.  
  
  
    Amy stops stuffing her face and her eyes seem to light up with a fire. "Are you serious? He hasn't even tried to call?" She stabs her fork into the cake a little bit too aggressively, the table creaking under her strength. "Oh when he gets back he's definitely getting a talking to." Shadow knows that's a promise and not a threat, a smile creeping onto his normal grumpy features.  
  
  
      
    "I don't know why it's bothering me." He continues, Amy listening with eagerness as her ears twitch to his tone pitch. "I've never cared before how long he disappeared for, but since we've been dating.." His voice trails off, his brows furrowing in thought. Amy being much more emotionally in tune than he is, knows what the issue is immediately, but waits for him to finish. "I feel like something is missing. It's... upsetting."  
  
  
  
    "You miss him, I think it's natural to miss your boyfriend, Shadow." Amy explains, twirling her fork, mixing whats left of her cake into a spongy mess. "I'm surprised you're not mad at him for not even bothering to contact you." She huffs, "Though, I guess I'm mad enough for the both of us." Shadow nods at that, doing his best not to chuckle. Amy was always so genuine with him, it was refreshing.  
  
  
  
    He shifts his gaze down towards his coffee, hands rapping against the table in thought. "I'm still adjusting to being here, again." He says, Amy tilting her head to the side. "Ah, here, being alive." He clarifies. Amy's expression turns in something Shadow's never seen on her before. A sad smile, a facade to try and cover up how torn up everyone was over what happened before, including herself. He pushes on with the conversation, not wanting to damper the mood. "How do I deal with this?"  
  
  
  
    "Deal with what?" She asks, finally shoving another forkful of whats supposed to be cake into her mouth.  
  
  
  
    "Missing him. This feeling. I don't like it. It's annoying." His bluntness makes her choke, and she sputters weakly, coughing as she drinks her tea.  
  
  
  
    Her voice is incredulous, shaking as she tried to hold back her laughter "Shadow you can't just wish your feelings away!" She exclaims. "Unfortunately for you Mr. Unsmiley," She says, a giggle finally escaping her, "You have to deal with it until you see him again."  
  
  
  
    His lips purse into a pout, clearly not pleased with this 'advice.'  
  
  
    "Sorry! But that's how it is!" Amy sighs. "When he comes back from /wherever/, let him know that it's not cool to do this! He needs to keep in touch, let you know he's doing okay, all that mushy stuff."  
  
  
  
    "Mushy stuff." He mimics, brow quirking. "Like what you turned your cake into?"  
  
  
  
    "No!!!!!!!!" Amy's cheeks flush red, redder than his highlights, and he smirks.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
    After their meetup, Amy sent plenty of texts to Shadow checking in on him. Only two days had passed, but that feeling in his heart was stronger than ever. He did appreciate Amy and Rouge's attempts at comforting him. It just wasn't who he wanted.  
  
  
  
    And when that certain someone finally did come waltzing into Rouge's club, casual as ever, Shadow felt Amy's rage bubble up inside himself mixed with an intense need to grab hold of him and not let go ever again, to tell him he needed him by his side. A flurry of emotions surging through him as he watches Sonic wave to him, grinning cheerily. Possessiveness? Control? Desire? Something of all three, something combined, something deeper than he's ever felt before. Anger, Relief, a deep seated pit in his heart, deeper than liking someone. He never experienced this before on the ARK in his previous life, why now.  
  
  
  
    When Sonic calls his name it hits him. He bolts up from his seat, and takes Sonic's hands in his, dragging him to the backroom of the club, into his bedroom. Sonic's blabbering the entire time, surprised and confused. When the door shut behinds them he still doesn't release Sonic's hands. Sonic's just standing there stunned, trying to figure out what the hell just happened, looking like a doe caught in headlights.  
  
  
    The imaginary cogs finally slide into their proper place, and there's no more uncomfortable grating sounds, just smooth clicks as the gears turn. It was love. Shadow was in love with Sonic.  
  
  
  
    "N-Nice room." Sonic sheepishly smiles, and Shadow's snapped out of his thoughts. Releasing his iron grip on Sonic's hands.  
  
  
  
    "Sorry about that." He quickly says, there wasn't much in his room, and Sonic's never actually been in here before. It's sparse. A bed and dresser, a desk littered with books in the corner with a stool. "We need to talk."  
  
  
  
    Sonic noticeably flinches at those words. "Uh, am I in trouble?  
  
  
  
    "No." A pause. "Yes, but no." He knows he's not making much sense. "Just come sit with me." He finishes up, walking to his bed and sitting on the edge, waiting for Sonic to follow. He's hesitant, but follows after him. Taking a seat beside him, hands twisting and turning into each other with nerves.  
  
  
  
    "So..." Sonic mutters.  
  
  
  
    "Don't leave like that again." Shadow uttered. He paused, shaking his head, not meaning to say it like that. He didn't want to control Sonic, no, he just wanted more communication between them. "You can leave for adventures." He corrects. "But at least message me, call me, anything that lets me know you're alright."  
  
  
  
    "Aw, come on Shadow, you know I can take care of myself. Nothin' bad's gonna happen to me." Sonic tries to reassure, nonchalant as he reaches for Shadow's hands. Shadow pulls away.  
  
  
      
    "That's not the point." He practically hisses, making the other hedgehog flinch. "I was worried, yes, but more importantly going that long without any word from you.." It was embarrassing to say, but Amy was right. He had to be honest about this. "I missed you. A lot."  
  
  
  
    Silence permeates the room. Shadow's staring directly at Sonic, watching him shift his weight back and forth as his legs bounce with jitters. Was it too much too soon? They've only been dating a month, but they've known each other so much longer. His heart was flip flopping in his chest, feeling like it would burst from anxiety. Then Sonic finally speaks.  
  
  
    "I missed you too, that's why I came here as soon as I got back into town." He explains. "I haven't even checked in with Tails yet." A weak chuckle, still feeling like he's in trouble. "But if calling you will help ya, I'll make sure I check in earlier next time." Sonic nods to himself, making a mental note in his brain so he's sure he doesn't forget. "Sorry. I didn't mean to upset you." He sounds so meek, so unlike the normal cheerful, laid back blue hedgehog Shadow knows.  
  
  
  
    "It's okay." Shadow says, hand covering Sonic's. Sonic's hands wrap around his, and squeeze tight. Like he's trying to make sure it's really okay, that they're okay. "I'm still not used to this." Shadow repeats himself, over and over, the same thing. I'm still not used to being back. I'm still not used to being alive. He doesn't know if he ever will feel completely alive again. He doesn't know if he can live normally. Learn how to function normally. Learn the mysteries of his heart, and how it works. The cogs are in place, whirring smoothly, Shadow just needs to tell the truth, and maybe then, he'll feel okay. He'll feel alive. "I don't understand a lot of the things I feel, but I remembered something." Was remember the right word? He remembered how he felt about Maria. That was love. Familial love. He used to read books with Maria about romance. A princess falling in love with a prince. They live happily ever after. He definitely wasn't a princess, and Sonic wasn't a prince, but he wanted to live happily ever after with him. He just needs to say it.  
  
  
  
    "I think I'm--", Cutting himself off, he clears his throat, getting ready to correct himself. "I know I'm in love with you."  
  
  
  
    Sonic's breath hitches in his throat, it's so audible in the quiet bedroom, Shadow's hand squeezes his. Like his hands holding his were the only thing keeping them anchored to this world. Shadow's still staring directly at him, refusing to look away.  
  
  
    "Wow." Sonic finally says, a whisper, his voice suddenly raspy. Like his throat just dried up. He finally looks up at Shadow, and he looks completely dumbstruck. Like the words are still rattling around in his head. "Seriously?"  
  
  
  
    Shadow smiles, genuinely smiles at him, not a hint of anger or sadness in it. He feels like he should be embarrassed, but for some reason he's not. He's confident, his pride shining through. "Yes. I love you."  
  
  
      
    Sonic's cheeks flush, and he has to stop himself from averting his gaze. "I love you too." His voice is shaky, and he stutters on the words, but he manages to get them out.  
  
  
  
    It's quiet again, but this time it's not uncomfortable. It's almost soothing. Sonic leaning more into Shadow, moving closer to him. Shadow's other hand finally joins the other, and their hands intertwine. Shadow's confusing emotions fading into the back. For the first time since he woke back up, he feels truly alive.  
    


	2. ORANGE: HEALING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nightmares again, luckily Shadow is there to help.

It's okay. He has to remind himself of that daily. It's okay now. Even when he can still smell burning flesh, fumes and smoke filling his lungs, hand reaching out just a little too late, watching Shadow fall.  
  
  
  
    Even when he feels that intense, abrupt excruciating needle going through his chest, skewering him. Elise's scream tearing out of her throat echoing in his mind before the world goes black.  
  
  
  
    Even when Shahra tried to betray him, talking of destiny and promises as she died in his arms, being faced with a horror beyond his imagines, feeling his anger and grief manifest in him so strongly he actually transformed into something he never wanted to, but he had to.  
  
  
  
    It's okay. He tries to remind himself. It's okay. Emerl going out of control, after spending so much time with him. Viewing him not only as a friend, but a little brother, watching, watching, unable to do anything but watch as he was shut down, destroyed.  
  
  
  
    Every sacrifice he's had to make, only to wake back up, having to play it off like it was nothing. Like he still didn't feel the pain lingering, like it wasn't hard to breathe. Every farewell he's made to friends, insisting they'll see each other again, knowing the chances of that reality are slim to none.  
  
  
  
    It's okay.  
  
  
  
    He wakes up drenched in sweat, body trembling from another nightmare. He sits up quickly, shrugging the covers off of him, getting ready to get out of bed before a hand places itself gently onto his shoulder. Shadow's awake. Of course he's awake. Sonic muses, it would be hard to sleep with him thrashing through another nightmare.  
  
  
  
    "I'm okay." Sonic's voice is raspy, his throat completely dry. Shadow's sitting up with him, leaning over to hand him the glass of water they keep on the side desk. Sonic drinks it all in one go, muttering a thanks in return as Shadow puts it back on the desk.  
  
  
  
    "No you're not." Shadow replies, matter of fact. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." You can still tell he's sleepy, his words slurring together.  
  
  
  
    "I'm okay, honest." A lie. Shadow doesn't call him out on it. "Just another- another weird dream." It wasn't weird, it was a recurring one. One where he was just a little too late on saving Tails from an explosion, watching his closest friend and brother die. He doesn't know why, it seems like it's his own psyche torturing him, maybe it happened in another life, maybe it's just his imagination going out of control. Either way, it wasn't fun anymore.  
  
  
    Shadow wraps an arm around his shoulders, pulling him closer. Sonic want's to get out of bed and let him get back to sleep, but he's so tired himself he just allows his body to be guided until he's resting side by side against Shadow. His head thunks against Shadow's, causing them both to wince.  
  
  
  
    His eyes close and he's greeted with the same scene that replayed in his dream. "It was just a dream." Shadow starts, hand massaging Sonic's shoulder gently. "I know it's hard. I have the same dreams." His mind goes back to the ark, and he remembers Shadow went through that, went through worse things, he doesn't even know what Maria looks like, but he wish he did. Wish he knew more about the person who meant the world to Shadow. "I used to think it'd be my own personal hell, forever."   
  
  
  
    "Used to?" Sonic asks.  
  
  
    "You're not alone." Shadow mumbles. "I'm not alone. We're not alone." He must be so tired, he's repeating the same thing a lot. "The weight of the world is on your shoulders all the time, but." There's a heavy pause. Sonic finally opens his eyes, still greeted with the darkness of their bedroom, but no longer seeing shadows of his dreams. He wants to look over at Shadow, but his limbs all feel heavy. So he continues to rest on his shoulder, waiting for Shadow to speak again.  
  
  
  
    "It doesn't have to only be on yours. I'm here for you. You're here for me. We can share the load together." Shadow's voice is so clear when he says this, it startles Sonic. He knows he always has his friends to help him, but it always does come down to him alone, Shadow knows what that's like better than anyone. The world always looking to you for an answer, a hero. "Nothing can change the past, but we can be there for each other now, we can help each other move forward in life." Sonic doesn't say anything in response, just takes in his words, tries to let them sink in. It's all true. Everything Shadow has said is true. He always tries to help Shadow out whenever he has a nightmare, but there's a part of Sonic that makes him feel like he /has/ to handle his trauma by himself. Like it's expected of him.   
  
  
  
    But he doesn't have to. Shadow's here with him now, offering love and reassurance. He just has to accept it. Stop being so stubborn.  
  
  
  
    Shadow yawns, and breaks the heavy atmosphere, and Sonic can't help but laugh.  
  
  
  
    "What?" Shadow asks, voice on edge.  
  
  
  
    "I was just thinkin' I can be pretty full of it. Like you." Sonic's still laughing while he says that, affectionately nuzzling into Shadow, who scoffs at that, removing his arm from Sonic's shoulders. Shadow flops back down onto the bed and rolls away from Sonic, facing the wall.   
  
  
  
    "I'm going back to bed." He grumbles.  
  
  
    Sonic chases after him, this time he's the one wrapping his arm around Shadow, "Aw c'mon Shads, It was a joke." He cuddles up close, still nuzzling into him, peppering kisses on the back of Shadow's head.  
  
  
    "You better hope I don't remember the joke when we wake up again."   
  
  
  
    "Or what? You gonna /punish/ me?" Sonic teases, whispering into his ear.  
  
  
  
    Shadow groans, hand going to his face in annoyance, trying to wiggle further away from the blue hedgehog. "Go back to sleep already, please."   
  
  
  
    Sonic's laughing again, even if it feels like the world and every ones expectations might crush him sometimes, even if he has these horrible dreams. He's not alone anymore. Though, if he keeps up with his inappropriate joking, Shadow might start sleeping on the couch again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://idolatres.tumblr.com/
> 
> my writing blogggg!!! lets be friends ^o^

**Author's Note:**

> https://idolatres.tumblr.com/
> 
> my writing blog! headcanons & imagines are open!!  
> id love to talk about sonic more with people<3


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